Toughest dog on the Mountain
by Needs More Style
Summary: I'm Sparky, Stan Marsh's dog. I may be gay, but I've seen alot of things and I'll stop at nothing to help my master through any problems he might face... Including his crush on his best friend. (My first fic ever XD It's a Stan/Kyle aka Style)
1. A South Park Mutt

**Hi this is my first fanfic ever! I finally fixed it so everything isn't in bold anymore. Yay! Anyways, enjoy!**

I am Sparky. I am a dog. I live with my master, Stan Marsh, in a South Park. I'm here for the soul purpose of taking care of my little master... Or at least I think so.

Some people say I'm not to smart, but I'm a dog that spends most my time alone, waiting for master to get back from a place called 'school'. What else do you expect from me? I'm also pretty smart for a dog, I learned most of the English language. There still are times when a human uses a long fancy word, and I just sit there completely lost. Like 'homosexual'. I hear that word a lot, but I have no idea what it means. People like to use this to describe me. What the fuck does it mean?

People also call me gay. I know what gay means- and it's true. I'm a gay dog. I like the pink scarf I wear- well, I really just like the scarf. I'm colorblind, but everyone says its pink so I'm going with it. I think rainbows are pretty, even if I have to squint to see them, because again, I'm colorblind... I also mate with other boy dogs... No shame.

I really never understood the terms 'gay' and 'straight'. I know what they mean, I just don't know why humans use them so much. Instead of saying 'gay couple' just say love. Love is love no matter who you are. There's a dog on my street who fell in love with her master- of corse her master is married so it wouldn't work out, but love is still love.

My master used to have a hard time understanding this. Little master is a sweetie, but he seemed anti gay the first few days I was with him. In the end he ended up excepting me. That's when we became friends.

I was adopted by Master when he was getting good grades, so his masters took him to the pound to pick out a dog... It's funny how master is supposed to be the powerful one, but even my master is controlled by three older masters. His parents and his sister are masters to my master. Well, he adopted me when I was two, I'm three now in human years.

I really don't know what breed I am, I was abandon by my stray parents at a young age because I was gay. Master says I'm half Doberman and half wolf, if that's true I must be one tough dog!.. Well that's why master picked me. Because I looked like the toughest dog. I like to pretend that I am, maybe I'm right.

I'm just glad master chose me. I'm the luckiest dog alive, given the gift of a happy family and loving master. Given the freedom to mate with whatever gender I want. My thank you for this gift is a promise. A promise that I'll stick with little master through thick and thin.

**Author's notes: that was that. Please leave a review saying what you liked and what I should improve on. It would make me happy :) **

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	2. The Kyle

**Hi everyone! If you were wondering about why my last chapter was in bold, I have no idea... I tried to fix it, but it didnt work. I had better luck with this one :)**

**Also, the grammer IS supposed to be bad, this is literally a dog's POV. If it bothers you, stop reading, because I like how this is writen. Thank you, and please enjoy 3**

Hello again. I see you came back to learn more about my life as the toughest dog in South Park.

Well, pull up a chair, because we're about to start!

Today little master came home from school with another little boy that everyone calls the Kyle.

I can tell that something is going on between master and the Kyle. Don't ask how, I just know. I'm pretty sure they're in love, but nothing ever really happens when the Kyle comes over.

They just watch the TV box, it's a bunch of clips telling a story. Its like magic or something.

Sometimes they use writing sticks to scribble on papers that they got from a place called 'school'.

Well I always notice how master will look at the Kyle at times where they don't need to look at each other.

I notice how he blushes every the Kyle touches his hand.

I can see how happy and unfocused he is when the Kyle is around.

Little master is also always sad after the Kyle goes home.

You'd think if your best friend (or the love of your life) came over, you'd be pretty happy. Not little master.

After the Kyle leaves, he lays in his bed looking at the ceiling, or out the window staring at nothing. A few times he even started crying.

I always wish that little master would talk to me. He's done it before. When the Wendy broke up with him, he told me all about it. The thing is, it seems like he felt a little better after he did.

I want to help him. Let me help you, master. I swear I would speak if my vocal cords allowed it.

The Kyle is actually over right now. Him and master are watching the TV box.

They always watch a weird show about Canadians farting. I'm a gay dog, I won't judge.

Well, the Kyle is watching the show, master is facing the TV, but his eyes are on the Kyle. Every few minutes, he'd look up at the ceiling and take a deep breath.

He was blushing a little. He also blinking for a long time. Like, he keeps his eyes closed for 30 seconds at a time.

Of corse he laughed every time a fart joke shows up, but I think he's faking.

Why is master like this? He's normally happy when the Kyle is around. Is he ok? Is my master broken? Should I take him to a vet? Jesus Christ! Help me!

Suddenly the Kyle got of the dog-free-couch. I call it that because dogs aren't allowed on it.

Anyways, the Kyle said goodbye and left. Master said goodbye and smiled... A fake smile.

After the Kyle left he sighed. He walked upstairs to his room and I followed. Master sat on the bed and patted the spot right next to him while making eye contact with me. I know what that means! Yay, he's inviting me on the bed! Im not normally allowed on the bed, so I'm pretty happy.

I hoped up on the bed and curled up next to little master. He pet my back while breathing deep. I looked at him, I was making the face of 'what's wrong?'. He ignored me, but I'm not giving up!

I started licking his face like 'come on, chin up!' Master laughed a little, which is a good sign, I hope.

I did this until master finally said. "Ok, ok! Stop it, Sparky!" He scratched behind my ear, looking a lot happier now.

My ear is my tickle spot so my leg started shaking. After a minute of this, he sighed again and got sad.

He lay on his bed, and grabbed me in for a hug. He held me tight, a good kind of tight.

"Oh, Sparky. I wish I was a dog. You have no worries. Being a human sucks!" He says to me.

Come on, master. Don't talk like that. "Sparky? You know how I used to think you were weird for liking other boys? Yeah well..." Master blushed.

You can tell me anything master! Just tell me. Please, let me help you.


	3. Helping Master

**Hello! I'd like to thank you for reading my fic**

**It really makes me happy to know that people keep coming back to read my stuff. And to all my new readers, thanks for making it to chapter 3! Hope you enjoy**

Spit it out, master! Tell me what's wrong already! I started pawing at his chest.

"Well... I think I might like boys too." Master sighed.

I'm glad he's telling me, it's not like I'm gonna tell anyone. I'm probably just gonna tell other dogs, but they can't talk to people, so no worries. Master, your secrets are semi safe with me.

"It's Kyle. I like him- I REALLY like him... but we're best friends! Its so wrong." He sighed. Chin up, master. There is nothing wrong about love.

"I was supposed to tell him today! I was supposed to tell him last week, I was supposed to tell him two months ago! I just can't! I'm such a pussy.." He said sadly.

Oh, thats why he's always so sad after the Kyle leaves. Because he never gets to tell him how he feels. Master, life can get hard, but NEVER call yourself a cat! "How am I supposed to tell him, Sparky?"

Master started to tear up, he buried his face in my furry side and bawled. I felt bad, but I'm here for him. Always.

I licked his hand to get his attention. He looked at me. I closed one eye. I think it's called a 'wink'. Humans always do weird body movements. My favorite one is the 'wink'. I like it because it can be seductive, or just wishing luck. I was wishing luck.

Master smiled a broken smile. He gave me a hug. "I love you, Sparky." I love you too, master.

Master got off the bed, I followed. He started to work on the papers he got from 'school'. When it was time for dinner, we went down stairs. Master filled my food bowl and I wolfed it down.

Master sat down to eat. I'm not sure what they were eating, but it smelled good. I love human food! Half the time I don't even know what it is, but it's delicious! Dog food is just meaty dry kibble, but human food is different every time! I went underneath the table and licked master's feet. He's ticklish there. He giggles and pulls his legs out from under the table. Master sneaks me a bit of the meat they're eating. It's good, I think it's chicken.

After dinner I went straight to the bathroom. Not my bathroom, the human one. I'm not sure what happens in the human bathroom, but it has a giant bowl for drinking! I stuck my head in and lapped up the water. Little master's big sister walked in.

"Eww! Sparky what are you doing?!" She grabbed me by my scarf and pulled me out of the human bathroom just as master was walking by.

"Hey turd! Your dumbass dog was drinking from the toilet again!" She yelled as she slammed the bathroom door. Humans can be so selfish, hoarding that drinking bowl for only themselves. "Sparky, that's gross" master said as he laughed.

As soon as it got dark outside. Master flopped down on his bed. Tonight was a night master let me sleep with him. I jumped up on the bed and laid next to him. He wrapped his arms around me, and soon went to sleep.

Ya did good, Spark, ya did good.

As a dog it's my job to teach master that he's not alone, even if he can't have the Kyle.

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	4. Besties

**Hi! I'm so happy that people keep coming back **

**Anyways, there's a dog named Mocha in this chapter. She belongs to Tweek, I made her up, but I don't consider her an OC, she's just a side character. Just putting that out there...**

In the Marsh home, there's no other animals. I really don't have anyone else to talk to.

Master just went to school, so I decided to hang out with my best friend, Mocha. (The one who has a crush on her master...) She's a pure breed miniature poodle who belongs to the Tweaks.

She may be a poodle, but she's no show dog. She doesn't have the fancy cut fur, she just has short curly fur all over because the Tweaks don't have time to cut her fur. Lucky for her, Tweek brushes her daily.

I walk out my little doggy door and trot outside in the snow to get to Tweak bros. Once I'm there I look into the window and I see her. Mocha makes eye contact and comes outside to join me.

"Hey there, sugar." She greets me with her southern accent. "Hi Mocha how's it going?" I ask her. "It's been just dandy here at the shop." She snickered a little. "My little Tweek got himself a boyfriend!" She giggles.

I sigh a happy sigh. "Young gay love, isn't it beautiful?" I reply. "It sure is, sugar." She winked. "Speaking of young love, my Stan has a crush." I say proudly.

"Oh really? Who is it this time? The Wendy? The Bebe?" Mocha asks, expecting a girl. "Nope, the Kyle!" I say with a wink. "The Kyle?! Well who say that coming a mile away?" She said as she giggled. "I hope they're as happy as Tweek is with the Craig!" She smiled at me.

I didn't really know how to respond. "Well..." I said looking off into space. Mocha can detect the doubt in my voice. "Oh dear, sugar. Tell me what's wrong, y'all." Mocha said sitting next to me.

"My little master has been sad lately... He doesn't know how to tell the Kyle how he feels. He says it's wrong to love his best friend."

"Sugar cube, the heart wants what the heart wants. Y'all can't put a warning signal on it." Mocha said with a sigh. "That's what I've been trying to tell him, but he can't hear me." I said looking down at my front paws.

"Y'all's master can hear ya! Ya just gotta talk with your eyes." Mocha said. She started making different expressions with her eyes.

"Thanks for this talk, Mocha."

"My pleasure, sugar cube." She smiles. I smiled back. "Hey, we should go shopping later." I suggested.

"I'm there, sugar!" She said.

Just then the Tweek showed up in the doorway. I would never say this out loud to Mocha, but the Tweek is one messed up kid! He's always shaking and twitching. Sometimes I want to take him to the vet. But, he belongs to Mocha, not me. Oh, and Mocha has a crush on the Tweek's dad, not the Tweek. I feel like I wasn't making that clear enough.

Anyways, the Tweek seemed a lot less shaky and nervous ever since he started dating the Craig, so that's always a good thing.

The Tweek whistled and called Mocha's name. He called her back inside the coffee shop. "See y'all later, sugar." She said to me as she trots into the store. "Bye, Mocha!"

I call back as I walk away. Mocha is my bestie, I can always talk to her about anything. She's one of the few beings in my life that can understand me.

I would go to Mr. Kitty because she lives closer, but she's an asshole. Plus she's a cat. I fucking hate cats, they're jerks.

It's time to go home and wait for master to get back.

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	5. Why I hate Cats

**Here is chapter 5, enjoy!**

On my way home from Tweek Bros, I saw Mr. Kitty was outside. Don't be fooled by her name, this little asshole is 100% female. Her master is sexist, so she's called Mr. Kitty... Even her master is an asshole.

The Cartman has complete control over her, but she won't admit that the Cartman is her master. She calls him her servant. All cats are like this! Humans adopt them, and cats expect their masters to serve them! This is why you should get a dog, every human reading this!

I tried to get by her without starting anything, but she stopped me. "Hey faggot." Kitty snickered. I growled. "Kitty, I just want to go home." I said, trying to keep my head. "Why? You gonna suck your slave's dick some more, you fucking homo!" She smirked, trying to tick me off... It worked.

"Leave my master out of this! And stop using words that I don't know!" I barked. "Just admit that humans are inferior. They're here to obey use and take care of us." Kitty said, barely hissing.

I noticed that small bruise on her forehead along side a small open cut. I stopped growling and ignored what she said.

"Kitty... Did the Cartman beat you again?" I said kind of soft. A good dog defends when he needs to, and is kind when he should be kind. That's what I intend to do, even with cats.

"N-None of your business! He is stupid and weak!" Kitty hissed, I could hear the sadness in her voice. I took a step closer and licked that cut on her forehead. She jumped back. "Get off me! I don't want your dog germs!" She turned around and sat in the snow. She licked her paw and rubbed her forehead, grooming herself.

"Kitty, you gotta tell the police dog. Or at least a PETA dog." I said with passion. Mr. Kitty got up and walked back to her house... Back to the evil Cartman.

She's such a pussy. If master tried to hit me, I'd bite his hand off. Yet, I have never bit master, he's never given me a reason to bite. I snapped at him once, but he was trying to take the rawhide bone I was chewing on. Many dogs would do the same, and it was totally called for, right?

Anyways after that experience, I trotted home, back into my doggy door and I got on the couch. Normally I'm not allowed on the couch, but master and the Shelly are at school, and the parents are at work, so the house is basically mine.

I walked into the kitchen to try to find some food... Human food. I can't open the fridge, so that sucks.. I did find some pills though!

I dumped them out and ate an entire container of them. They tasted bad and after a while, I couldn't walk. My entire body went limp and I threw up like eight times.

All I could do is lay in a pile if my own vomit, whimpering for help.

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	6. A Trip to the Vet

After eating the pills, my body went limp and I threw up a lot. I whimpered, waiting for help as I lay in the pile of my own vomit.

I stayed like this for about an hour, until the door swung open. It was master, here at my time of need. He stepped in and probably wanted a snack from the kitchen he saw me and the empty bottle of pills on the floor. "Jesus Christ!" He shouted as he ran over to me.

I yelped at the touch of his hand to my throat. It hurt like hell. Master jerked his hand away as soon as I yelped and grabbed the phone. He sounded scared, but I couldn't hear the words he was saying. The splitting pain in my stomach and head distracted me from what master's words.

The parents came home as fast as they could. "Randy! Take the dog to the vet, I'll clean up this mess!" The mom yelled. The dad scooped me up and took me to the car. I was put in the trunk and the dad took the driver's seat. Master took the back seat closest to me.

As the car started moving, I held back my need to puke. Master kept talking to me like "It's ok", "Your gonna be fine", "hang in there". Poor master, he has so much to deal with in his life and now he has a sick dog.

I'm scared, I hate the vet. The office is colder then it should be, the veterinarians all wear white and it's creepy, and all in all it's just a sad place to be. Crying puppies waiting to be 'fixed' with needles and knifes...

It makes me shutter just thinking about it. Master would never fix me... I'm not broken, right? Balls are a good thing to have, why get them cut off?

Anyways, we arrived and I was taken out of the car. After a long time of waiting, seeing puppies wimped about their balls getting cut off, it was my turn. The veterinarian puts his cold hand on me and in my mouth. I forgot what pill I had taken even though it was said about twenty times.

After a conversation with master's dad and the veterinarian, I had an injection that put me to sleep. I don't know what happened when I was asleep, all I know is that I woke up feeling great! The veterinarian is like a witch with weird supernatural powers.

As soon as the veterinarian took me out of the operating room, master ran up to me. "Sparky! You're ok!" He yelled and gave me a big hug. I wag my tail. Yes master, I'm ok. Master gave me like a million kisses on my forehead. Master is a good human.

After that, we went home. The mess was cleaned and the pills were put on the shelf that I can't reach.

Just another day in the life of Sparky Marsh.

**Thanks for reading! Sparky loves you **


	7. Dog Park

It's Saturday at last! I love the weekends, it's a time to just relax and chill out with my family.

Master of corse is currently enjoying the awesomeness of sleeping in. I'm a dog, and I always wake up at the same time, even if I want to go back to sleep. It's hard being a dog... At least I can sometimes get a nap in around 12:00, if I'm lucky.

Anyways, I'm getting a little jealous of master. He slept in for about an hour now, and I'm still not getting invited on the bed. This is fucked up... This is animal abuse... I'm calling PETA! Nah, I'll just wake him up myself.

I put my front paws on the bed and kind of lifted myself up, but not completely on the bed, just enough to reach master. I started licking his face until he opened his eyes. Good morning, sunshine!

"God dammit, Sparky, it's like 7:00 in the morning!" Obviously he can't go back to sleep now, and he's upset. When master is upset I just do the thing I do best to make him smile again. I lick his face even more.

He giggles and pushes me away. I have to put my paws back on the ground, but not for long.

Master pats the bed beside him, calling my name. Fucking finally.

I jumped up on the bed. I love the bed, it's so cozy and I see why humans prefer this over the floor, which is where I sleep most of the time.

Master wraps his arms around me, like he always does when we lay together and he closes his eyes. He's still sleepy, I can tell. "It's gonna be today, Sparks..." He yawned, followed by a smile. "I'm gonna tell Kyle today." He opened his eyes in mid sentence. Master blushed, he always does when he talks about the Kyle.

I winked at master for good luck, which made him smile even more. After a while, he got up off the bed and went down stairs for breakfast. I followed, ate my food and some of master's. the human bathroom door started being closed often ever since the Shelly wined about me taking my fair share of the water bowl.

Master spent a lot of time with me this morning. The dad was at work, and the mom was going to take the Shelly shopping... Lucky bastard, I wanna go...

Anyways at like 10:00, I think, the mom told master to take me to the dog park since she didn't trust me in the house without adults ever since the pills.

"But mom! The new Terrance and Phillip is starting in ten minutes!" Master said in protest. "No, you have to go. I already scheduled with Sheila that Kyle would go with you." The mom argued. I think the mom won this round, sorry master. "W-Wait, Kyle's gonna be there?" Master asks with a super light blush on his face. You can see it if you squint, I know it's there...

"Yes, Stanly. Sheila decided to go shopping with me and your sister. We're gonna have our very own little girl's night out. Plus, Sheila says Kyle has been inside to much. So have you. You two need to go outside." The mom said, buttoning up the Shelly's winter coat.

Master certainly did not look prepared for this. He buried his face in his hands. "Oh boy.." He mumbled. After some getting ready, he puts me on a leash and walks me to the the Kyle's house.

He knocks at the door, the Kyle stand there. "Hey dude!" The Kyle greeted. "Hi." Master said back. "It sucks that we have to miss the new Terrance and Phillip, doesn't it?" The Kyle said, pouting. "Well, at least we get to hang out." Master said rubbing the back of his head. The Kyle giggles and playfully punches master on the shoulder. "You sound gay, dude!" He says as he steps out of the house. Master looked pretty tongue tied. "Yeah.." He replied followed by fake laughing.

God dammit, master. Confession time!

On the walk to the dog park, I was waiting for confessions, but all they did was talk about video games and TV and stuff about 'school'. I was pretty desperate any of them to make a move.

It's obvious that the Kyle likes master! He's just good at hiding it.. But he does send messages- lots of messages. Like, he'll reach for master's hand, he'll talk to master with his face closer then it should be, and sometimes I'll even catch this guy put his arm around master. But of corse, my master is completely oblivious!

Sometimes I consider the fact that master is inferior, but I snap out of it. I can't ever think like that, I must prove the cats wrong.

Well, master is so oblivious that it has gotten to the point where it annoys me.

Master, do you want the Kyle? The Kyle wants you! Get with the Kyle already! Like what the fuck?! Even Mr. Kitty agrees that something needs to happen already...

Freaking human emotions are complicated... If I like a dog, I mate with it. I don't go through all this bullshit...

Back to what's going on- We just arrived at the dog park. Open space to run and lots of butts to smell! Today there's not that many, but I run right in as soon as master unleashes me.

I want to see who I know here... And if any cute boys are interested in me.

Long story short, after mating with a fluffy white dog, I found Mocha!

I trotted over to her. "Hey, girl!" I called. "Howdy" she said back. She didnt make eye contact, she was smiling with her eyes focused on her master. I focused my eyes on the Tweek to see what Mocha's so happy about.

The Tweek was standing next to the Craig. After a tiny terrier puppy licked the Tweek's hand, he had a panic attack, I'm not surprised. "Gah! W-what if the d-dog is t-tasting me do he can eat me?!" He screamed as he twitched and pulled his hand away from the puppy. The Craig grabbed the Tweek's hand. The Craig then kisses the messy haired boy's cheek. The Craig didn't say anything. He didn't need to say anything.

The Tweek calmed down completely. Damn, that was pretty fucking adorable.

"Well, that's officially the cutest thing I've seen all day." I claim with a smile. "Oh, is it, Sugar? I bet we can beat the record if we try." She said winking. "What are you suggesting?" I say, tilting my head with an unsure look on my face.

Mocha snickered and pointed at master and the Kyle with her muzzle. I shake my head in an approving, yet disapproving way. "Oh Mocha, you are the Cupid of all dogs."

I say this because she's always so obsessed with everyone's relationship. If anyone is kissing, flirting, or even just seems like they're meant to be, Mocha will be the first to say "D'aww!"

Mocha laughed. "Well, if two people love each other and won't admit it, they could use my help!" Mocha justified. "You know who also said that? The Cartman!" I stated back. Mocha loves love to much..

"Y'all's either with me or against me." I know I don't want my master's life to be screwed with, but I'm tired if waiting for fluffy moments! Plus, how could I say no to a fave like Mocha's? I sigh and smile. "I'm with you."

"Well, alrighty then, sugar!" She whispered the plan in my ear. It was so crazy, it just might work!

"Mocha, your insane!... The good kind" Mocha winks at me. "I know, sugar"

**Hi! If you're a reader of my other fics, they will be coming late today, but I promise that they will be updated today! Just wait a few hours... Sorry! **

**I hoped you liked this chapter, I had a lot of fun writing this one**


	8. Beating the Record

**Sorry this was uploaded late today. And sorry this was supposed to be uploaded yesterday. I hope you like it anyways :3**

We were at the dog park, it was just minutes after Mocha told me her crazy plan to make the cutest moment between Master and the Kyle.

There's so much chance of failure, but also a pretty big chance of success- and that's what we're going for! Success is never a bad thing... Unless your a terrorist... Or a rapist... Or a murderer... I'm getting off topic again!

The the little poodle looked at me. "Let's do this!" She cheered. Mocha started off the plan by running up to the Kyle. She just kinda sat in front of him. The Kyle muttered something that I didn't understand, because the Kyle uses words that I'm not familiar with.

Mocha suddenly jumped up on the Kyle's lap and pulled his hat off of his head. She leaped off his lap and ran away with it. The Kyle stood up and chased after the small dog.

Master did to, but as planned, I grabbed master's hat and ran off in the other direction. Master of corse turned around and ran after me. "God dammit Sparky!" He yelled...

Master yells that a lot... Is that bad?

We ran, we knew the humans would never catch us! Me and Mocha kept up the chase until she gave me the signal. "Bring it in, partner!" She shouted, her words were slightly muffled by the Kyle's hat.

Me and Mocha ran towards each other, the two humans chasing. My path crosses Mocha's, forming a small 'X'. We kept running, but the humans were obviously not looking where their going, and their heads slammed into each other.

Master, being the taller and bigger one, fell taking the Kyle with him. There they where, laying on top of each other, looking into each other's eyes. They were both blushing like crazy, and the Kyle struggled to get master off of him. It was adorable. Master didnt know what to do. He was confused, and Mocha loves it.

In a flash second it was over.

We were at home before I knew it. Master seemed very upset with me. I feel really bad now... Master walked upstairs, I followed just behind him. I whimpered in hoped he'd forgive me. We got to his room, he opened the door, entered, and slammed the door in my face.

Geez, Sparky, you messed up real bad this time. I know I'm in trouble when master doesn't even let me in his room.

I slept outside master's room that night. I had a bad feeling the entire time. I couldn't tell if master was sleeping, swearing, crying, or plotting my death. All I knew was I'm a bad dog...

I'm a terrible dog...

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